The World According To Dick
New Jersey Senate President Richard (Dick) Codey is the driving force behind New Jersey’s recent efforts to require “childproof guns” when the technology becomes “economically viable.” Codey recently issued a statement regarding a protest in front of the New Jersey state capitol, held by the Second Amendment Sisters. That statement mocked the group by referring to them as the “twisted sisters,” all because of the group’s opposition to his proposed gun control laws.
Actually, the Second Amendment Sisters simply advocate a woman’s “right to choose” to own and carry firearms. But Dick Codey thinks the government should make that choice for them. He wants to abort their right to self-protection. He knows what’s best for a woman.
Unbelievably, Dick Codey’s publicly released statement also contained the following assertion: “If a woman is being raped, she should just sit back and enjoy it until a man comes along to rescue her.”
Well, that isn’t actually true. He never said any such thing. I just told a bald faced lie in only the third paragraph of this editorial. But it’s morally justified because I confessed to the lie in the fourth paragraph of the editorial.
But Dick Codey isn’t as honest as Mike Adams. He told the following lie in the first paragraph of his press release, which he recanted in the second paragraph of his press release:
“It may just be that I’ve been a little preoccupied with the recent enactment of the (fiscal year) 2005 Budget, but I wasn’t aware that, as the Second Amendment Sisters claim, society had gotten so bad that a woman’s only hope to avoid violence is to carry around an Uzi and not be afraid to use it.
“That statement isn’t exactly true, mind you, but gun advocacy groups, like the Second Amendment Sisters, would rather that the general population believe otherwise, because it’s through misinformation and fear that their cause actually gains any footing. Regardless of the actual facts, they’re willing to push a bleak world view where a woman’s only chance of survival is to have a bigger gun than the next person.”
Fortunately, Dick Codey does a little Moore than just mock women who want to own firearms for personal protection. He actually provides women with advice that can be used to help them avoid being raped, robbed, and murdered when they are unarmed and find themselves in danger. Let’s listen to his advice:
“I’d like to believe that there’s enough common sense left in the world that disputes don’t have to degenerate into a Showdown at the O.K. Corral. I’d like to believe that most women will choose to use basic common sense, such as traveling in large groups and only in well-lit, heavily populated areas, before resorting to violence on their own.”
Of course, Codey doesn’t seem to understand that women are Moore likely to be raped, robbed, and murdered in “heavily populated areas.” Nonetheless, I don’t want to spread “misinformation and fear” by injecting “actual facts” into the debate. Who wants to do that? When a woman gets off work at midnight, she can just call all her girlfriends to pick her up in a van and escort her to the parking lot. Maybe they can all wear their pajamas and have a slumber party afterwards.
But please, no handguns, in case one of those nasty pillow fights breaks out before sunrise!
In addition to specifics, Codey also provides women with a Lott of general information:
“The presence of a firearm rarely defuses a potentially violent situation, but rather, escalates violence to the breaking point. Rather than advocating for more guns on the street, we should bring attention to the need for more policemen in high-crime areas. I may be out of line here, but I’d rather see the decision to use lethal force being made by a highly-trained safety expert.”
Of course, Codey isn’t out of line at all. For years, I’ve been using the term “police officer.” But I’m glad that we’re going back in time to the good old days of referring to them as police “men.” I’ve never thought that women were fit for law enforcement and I’m glad someone has finally come out against hiring “police women.” Of course, he didn’t really say that but anything is fair game in my editorial. It’s sort of like a Democratic press release where you can say anything, even if the statement “isn’t exactly true.”
Speaking of going back in time, I almost forgot the last paragraph of Dick Codey’s press release. His respect for women’s concerns and disdain for condescension come bursting forth in this grand finale:
“When the Second Amendment Sisters are willing to have a rational discussion of how to improve women’s safety in a civilized world, I’m open to that discussion. If they’d rather live in the Old West, where gunfights on street corners were commonplace, I have a time machine I’m willing to sell them that will go nicely with their unrealistic world views.”
So remember, even though your worldview is unrealistic, you must be careful at all times. Travel in large groups and only in well-lit, heavily populated areas. Dick knows what’s best for you, little sisters.
Mike S. Adams is the author of the book, Welcome to the Ivory Tower of Babel.